Tuesday, 10 February 2015

Marco Reus has broken the rumour mill


The attacker's selfish decision to signing a new contract has destroyed the summer for millions of people.


Marco Reus, you silly boy. Yes, of course they're paying you plenty enough to live on. And sure, that Jürgen Klopp's a nice (if slightly creepy) guy. And fine, perhaps this is true:



I am very happy with my decision to stay at BVB. Dortmund is my home town and Borussia simply my club. I am looking forward to a successful future with our team and our fantastic fans supporting us. There is a lot to do and I want to be part of that.



But still. Think of the damage you've caused. Think of what you've done to the most important entity in modern football. Think about the rumour mill.


As those of you who keep with the nonsense will know, Marco Reus had -- past tense! Oh Marco! -- a release clause that would, in theory, have permitted him to leave Dortmund this summer for the relatively small sum of €25m. Any club with even a modicum of self-respect had been linked with him at some point -- Arsenal, Manchester United, Liverpool, Bayern Munich, etc. and so on -- but the front-runners were, obviously, Real Madrid.


But this isn't just about one collapsed move, oh no. Reus' careless vandalism has sent ripples through the fabric of the entire speculative future transfer market. His impending move to Madrid was, after all, one of the key pieces of evidence -- along with that time he didn't pass and that time some people booed and, er, that other time some people booed -- to support the theory that Gareth Bale was on the way out of the Bernabeu and off to Old Trafford. Apparently Ed Woodward has a little jar on his desk marked 'Bale money', just waiting for the right moment.


That move had its equal and opposite reaction -- give or take a few million euro -- in David de Gea's return to the Spanish capital. Another move up in smoke, and another set of ripples. Whichever MLS teams have started jockeying for Iker Casillas might want to look into a plan B, while Tottenham can leave their plans to replace Hugo Lloris on hold for the moment. A delicate ecosystem of inter-dependent, carefully balanced rumours, evolved slowly and imperceptibly over the fullness of time, scythed down by an uncaring bright yellow bulldozer.


So what do we find in the space left by this clearance? Absolute chaos. Even though they weren't perhaps favourites, all those other Reus hopefuls have had the top clipped from their shopping list, and who knows what they might decide to? Perhaps Manchester City will look down the M62, see Raheem Sterling hovering tentatively over an unsigned contract and throw some cash at Liverpool; perhaps Liverpool, noted experts at spending large amounts of cash, will scoop up another motley collection of the promising, the overpromoted, and James Milner.


By this stage, everything is in flux. Bayern Munich are combing the Bundesliga for the next big German thing, while Pep Guardiola is combing the continent for a fullback with ideas above his station. Arsène Wenger has reverted to the German-before-last on his list, and is stood outside Julien Draxler's window crooning sweet sweet songs; he is, at least, until Karl-Heinz Rummenigge turns up in a noisy Audi. Manchester United are fluttering their eyelashes at Memphis Depay, seriously inconveniencing Tottenham in the process. But then, that's United for you. They give with one hand, they take away with the other.


And what, finally, of Real Madrid, robbed of their status signing. Well, when you've missed out on a goalkeeper and a wide player, there's only one place to go shopping, and that's central midfield. Paul Pogba is already brilliant and only going to get brillianter, and more importantly he'll cost an eye-watering, ear-melting, nose-exploding amount of money. Which is just how Madrid like it.


Of course, this means Chelsea are going to have to look elsewhere, and one or two of Madrid's other players might also consider their positions, and Juventus will have to find something to do with all that lovely money, and so on and so on. Look, Marco, we had this all sorted out. Now it's a mess. Ultimately, for everybody's sake, and the feelings of Dortmund's fans notwithstanding: we can only hope that he was lying.






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